Fives
Just one of the many, many lists:
Five great reasons to buy a Hummer™
- You’ve been wanting to buy much wider groceries (but have been stymied by the timid width of your Escalade)
- You and your make-believe wife were thinking of having 11 or 12 imaginary kids
- You’re sick of always being the environment’s goddamned bitch
- You could totally put a keg back there and just drive around and shit
- They were all out of penises